Swig's mission

Retr0

Retr0

Janitor
Codec: Beep beep Swigs, who is munching on some doritos: Munch Munch Colonel Sips: "SWIGS WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! THE ENEMY WILL SURELY FIND YOU IF YOU KEEP EATING THOSE DORITOS!" Swigs, who is now licking his fingers: "But Colonel, I cant stay away from the delicious taste of Cool Ranch flavored Doritos!" (Proceeds to eat.) (Swigs starts to reach into the bag, making the bag crinkle. A genome soldier hears this and tries to trace down the origin of the sound. He spots Swigs. Swigs reacts by throwing whatever is left of the doritos on the enemy.) Genome Soldier: "What the!" (The powder left from the doritos gets into the genome soldiers eyes. He screams then evaporates.) Colonel Sips: "Outstanding Move." Swigs: "You should have known better, Colonel Sips. I picked these up from Otacon. They are an effective weapon." (Swigs throws away the bag and continues into the next room.)

To be continued?
 
Retr0

Retr0

Janitor
Codec: beep beep - Swigs: "Syden Sips, disregard what i just told you, the most important thing for you to go and do now is enjoy a mouthwatering egg mcmuffin sandwich from the new all day breakfast menu at McDonald's. All of your favorite McDonalds breakfast items now available all day at participating McDonald's restaurants, and ryden, always remember, I'm lovin' it."

Syden Sips: enjoying his mcdonalds, "alright boss, but the colonel asked me to the 'turn the game console off right now' what do i do?

Swigs: loudly, DO NOT, LISTEN TO THE BALD MILITARY MAN, DO NOT, DO NOT I REAP- bzzt, codec turns off

Swigs: FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

in a location, far, far away, in bankstown

Colonel Sips: Syden, in a mangled voice Turn the game console off right now, the simulation it is NOT REAL.

tune in next week on Swig's Mission
 
Swigs

Swigs

Greytide
The world powers interlock into a devasting Nuclear War. BOOM alot of people die and shit
When atomic fire consumed the earth, those who survived did so in great, underground fortresses (maybe by dwarves). When they opened, their inhabitants set out across ruins of the old world to build new societies, establish new villages, forming tribes, creating gangs.

As centuries passed, what had been the Australian southwest united beneath the flag of the New Sco-Monian Empire, dedicated to old-world values of VB, Democracy, Snags, and the Rule of Law. As the Empire grew, so did its needs. Eshays spread east, seeking territory and Centrelink payments, in the dry and merciless expanse of the Bogan Outback. They returned with tales of a city untouched by the warheads that had scorched the rest of the world, and a great WALL spanning the expanse of the all the red imbued earth...

The NSME mobilized its army and sent it east to occupy many water deposits one being warragamba dam, as well as Eucumbene, Burdekin Falls and the Darwin River and restore them to working condition. But across the Expanse, another society had arisen under a different flag. A vast army of slaves, forged from the conquest of 86 RSL Clubs: Pauline's Battalion

Four years have passed since the Empire held the Dams - just barely - against the Battalion's onslaught. The Battalion did not retreat. Across the expanse, it gathers strength. Campfires burned, training drums beat and ferals howl.

Through it all, the Star City Strip has stayed open for business under the control of its mysterious overseer, Mr Liquid, and his army of Rehabilitated Gronks and Law Enforcement "Shitsec" Robots

You are a Retarded Drug Consumed Postman, hired by the Old Australia Post, to deliver a package to the Star City Strip. What seemed like a simple delivery job has taken a SOLID turn…for the worse.
 
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